Category: September 2009

The Shack

William Paul Young

William Paul Young’s best seller The Shack is a unique way of looking at the relationship between man and God. Mackenzie Phillips returns to the shack where three and a half years before his youngest daughter Missy was murdered by the man who had abducted her from their campsite. Unable to get past his depression, he receives a note in the mail signed Papa, his wife’s name for God. The note was an invitation to return to the shack “next weekend if you want to get together.”

The Shack is a new approach to the proper relationship with God, and it appeals to people of all faiths as long as they believe in God. This is what has kept it on the list of best sellers for so long. Although I believe the approach a bit unorthodox in some respects, I enjoyed the book, especially the first part, which I found so touching. As I read, I found myself identifying with the main character in that at times my independence of God has led me to judgment, grief, suffering . . . The lesson here is that in our independence we limit or block our relationship with God, who desires a personal relationship with each of us. And in limiting our relationship, we block his power to work within us because as always, it is our choice. “All evil flows from independence, and independence is your choice,” Papa (God the Father) tells Mack. Later, she continues: “If I take away the consequences of people’s choices, I destroy the possibility of love. Love that is forced is no love at all.”

Although a beautifully crafted novel, it can be read as a “how to book,” how to establish a personal relationship with God.

This book is not at all about religion; and instead of preaching a sermon on the proper approach to a personal relationship with God, Young writes a novel; nor is this about any one religion or sect. God created us all, and he loves us all. He invites us all to come to Him.

In the novel, God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit—the Trinity—appear to Mackenzie Phillips, the main character, as ordinary people with extraordinary powers. God, for example, appears as a woman with whom Mack can easily relate as Papa.

Reviewed by Lee L. Peoples

My Sister’s Keeper

Jodi Picoult

How would you feel if you knew that the only reason you were conceived was as a donor for your sibling? For the entire thirteen years of her life, Anna Fitzgerald, the main character in Jodi Picoult’s best seller, My Sister’s Keeper, has been the main source of her older sister’s survival. Her sister Kate, three years older than she, has leukemia, and without the stem cells and the bone marrow from Anna, she cannot survive. Told uniquely from multiple first person points of view, this is a novel replete with suspense, irony, romance, compassion, humor, disappointment . . . and surprises. At the plot’s center are the main character Anna and her lawsuit against her parents Sara and Brian Fitzgerald. She is suing for medical emancipation, her right to make her own decisions about her body. This is the story of the family’s struggle for survival at all costs. Each chapter features the first person point of view of one of the characters: Anna, the main character; her lawyer, Campbell Alexander; her older sister Kate; her older brother Jesse; her mother Sara; her father Brian; and Julia, Anna’s court-appointed guardian ad litem.

To deal with the multiple problems that make up the complexity of conflicts in the novel as each of the principal characters interacts with and around the main character, Anna, the author chooses to tell the story of Anna’s fight for medical emancipation through multiple first person points of view. Every one of the principal characters has a problem of his or own to resolve, and the first person narration brings to the novel the subjectivity of each of the characters as each viewpoint is explored.

The lawyer, Campbell Alexander, provides much of the humor in the novel at just the right point—when emotions are running high and things seem to be at their lowest. He humorously dispels the myth that the only people with service dogs are blind people. At various points in the novel, in response to his dog’s being denied entry, he states, “This is a service dog.” Always their response is, “You’re not blind.” He always responds humorously: “I’m not . . . I’m a recovering alcoholic. He gets between me and a beer.” Another time is the explanation that he actually has an iron lung and Judge has been specially trained to guard against magnets. He tells another person he’s a lawyer, and his dog chases ambulances for him. Everyone, including the reader, is surprised when the truth of his service dog is revealed.

Perhaps this book and the subsequent movie will serve to make other parents think before they birth a child for the purpose of saving another child’s life. Perhaps they will think about the cost to their other children when one child seems always to be at the center of attention. In spite of the great love the parents have for each child, there is often that feeling of neglect on the part of the other children. We see this lack in Anna’s brother Jesse as we watch the trouble he gets into as he takes a back seat to terminally ill Kate, his sister.

Reviewed by Lee L. Peoples

Insights: Impermanence

Two of the difficult lessons of life are those of letting go and impermanence. Nothing . . . no one lasts forever, and many would welcome their parents and their pets agreeing to accompany them throughout their lives. I walk through a forest of trees and smell the scent of freesia or gardenia, but the smell doesn’t linger. It only makes its presence known in that moment. These experiences are only temporary, and it is the same with our loved ones and our pets.

Animals can teach us plenty about letting go and impermanence. We experience the joy of a beloved pet one day and the sadness of losing it sometime later. Dogs are always so happy to greet us. They wag their tails, lick our faces, and eagerly wait on us when we leave them alone. We have no choice but to let go because dogs only live 15 years or so, and no matter how strong our love and attachment, life must and will go on.

Some people find it strange how people can become so attached to their pets. I’ve been attached to a bird that I missed for years when he was no longer with me. My bird’s name was Rahab. He used to fly to me and sit on my shoulder and coo as I entered a room. I became attached because he showed me unconditional love. My mother speaks to her cats as if they are human, and I’m sure she’d miss them if they were gone. I’ve seen her fuss over them as if they were her own children. This is not strange, for animals as well as humans are capable of showing affection.

Be that as it may, nothing on earth will last forever. The mountains themselves will fade and the oceans will give way to deserts. We learn to let go when, as we grow older, our loved ones depart one by one. I know that one day I will outlive my mother whom I’ve secretly prayed would live forever. I have more than a few friends who’ve had to face the loss of their mothers, and I don’t want to lose mine. I want to hold onto her like a dying man holding onto a ledge, but ultimately her time will come and I will have to let go to face the depths.

Letting go involves facing ourselves and facing the fact that we are self-contained and can withstand almost anything. Once we live through the sadness of losing someone we care about, and then face the anger that comes on its heels, we will experience depression. Getting through that will take great strength, but we will be better for it. And in all reality our loved ones remain with us, alive in our hearts and in our minds.

I ached when my father died. He had been ill, and I never gave up the feeling that he would outlast the surgeries, the medications, and the pain of diabetes and heart disease. I held onto his memory for a long time, but soon that began to change. Now, I remember his face only vaguely and the most prominent memories are what it was like to hear him whistle when he was in a good mood, or how I always felt a cool breeze around him. He seemed to be always coming in from the cold. I smile when I remember because though gone, he is still present and will always in spite of our differences be a part of my soul.

Like the sweet smell of roses or apple pie or blueberry muffins, the aroma of him only lasts a moment. In letting that moment pass, I allow myself to experience another and another. Though here and gone, he will pass this way again.

Written by Lisa Trimarchi

Use Favorite Summer Fashion in Your Own Fall Collection

Use Favorite Summer Fashion in Your Own Fall Collection

Fashion weeks around the globe have already become the “it” calendar check-off in the industry. And whether or not you have the opportunity to make it backstage, have a seat at the show, hit after-show parties, and/or look at the pics from the shows in every fashion magazine you can find on the shelf at Borders, this event gives us ideas. It sort of sets the stage for the designer wear we want to purchase and find as a knockoff at a cheapy store. It’s fun to adopt a new color, a new trend, a new way of styling your outfits. But keep in mind, this doesn’t have to be an “in with the new and out with the old” process. There are current summer pieces in your closet that will add sass to your fall wardrobe collection.

Here are some ways to recycle, reuse, and retouch three of your favorite trends that keep you feeling ultra-cool in the hot, hot sun:

Tanks and Camisoles: So you wear your bright pink tank loud and proud with your jeans right now, right? Before you know it, you can throw a fun, printed scarf on top of it and wear a denim jacket with it. You may also want to try to wear the pink tank under a button-down blouse for work, with a poncho or shawl across your shoulders, or as a layering piece with your long-sleeve sheer tees. Let some color pop! (FYI: Every woman should have at least three tank top-like camisoles in her closet. The basic colors of black, white, and brown can save the day as undershirts, believe me.)

Sundresses: A sundress paired up with flat sandals is oh-so adorable! But as the fall approaches, this may not be practical. So find a pair of knee length boots in chocolate, black, or even purple (depending on the colors in your dress). As for how to stay warm here’s where you can have fun! A shrug, belted wrap sweater, bolero, and scarves will make a typical summer dress a fabulous fall staple.

Denim shorts: Ever throw a pair of opaque black tights under a pair of denim, frayed shorts? A great, funky combination may work perfectly for an eclectic personality. Think: denim shorts, black tights, black chunky UGG-like boots, and a loose long sleeve blouse or chunky sweater. There you are.

An alternative style that takes little effort but a lot of confidence! So make sure you are comfortable in your own skin, first.

I have no doubt that stylistas everywhere love fall because of the new fashion, and shopping for new must-haves. Tall boots, bright-colored booties, blazers, scarves, cowl neck sweaters, leggings, and flannel button-ups can make a gal’s wardrobe shine during a season that bridges the sun and gloomy weather. But don’t give up on what you already own! You will save money in the process and have fun stylizing the old with the new. Why stop wearing some of your favorite fashion pieces? Says who? Recycle, reuse, and retouch. That’s my motto.

Written by Elana Pruitt

Julia Anderson (“True Beauty”)

Julia Anderson, Winner of True Beauty and People Magazine‘s 100 Most Beautiful People, Is Living Life with No Regrets and Taking Her Dreams to a Whole New Level

“I went to the show promising I’d stay true to myself, my beliefs, my convictions, and that I would not do anything that I regretted.”—Julia Anderson, Winner of True Beauty

Little did she know that her friend’s suggestion to enter the True Beauty competition would lead to a career-altering path. Julia Anderson had recently competed in the Miss Texas competition, which didn’t go as well as she had hoped, and decided to go to an audition her best friend found online.

“Are you gorgeous? Do people stare at you when you walk into a room?”

Thinking the ad was ridiculous, but still curious, Julia was just looking for something else to do. “I just happened to have the day off from school and my three part-time jobs at the time. I saw it as a sign, so I thought I’d go ahead and go to that audition. From one callback to another, I ended up in LA and on the show.

How many competitors were there trying to get on?

There were hundreds, no, thousands of people. The show had traveled all around the world looking for contestants.

What an honor to be named the winner out of all those people!

It really is an honor, and I am so blessed. It’s such a cool show to have won. It makes me feel so great for my family . . . and they’re excited . . . and it shows how I was raised. It’s an honor for all of us, my entire family.

What was the experience like?

Reality TV is difficult (laughs). You don’t ever really know what’s going on and they keep you in the dark about everything. So it was rough. I’m not going to lie. No music, no TV, no books, no magazines . . . nothing. So I was by myself with these other contestants for a long period of time. And yeah, we were in a gorgeous house, but still we had no idea. You were literally living on the edge of your seat the entire time because you had no idea what was going on. It was a good experience. I learned a lot about myself, a lot about patience and how to live with nine other people in a house.

Did you find that there were some people who were particularly difficult to live with while you were doing the show?

When you’re sharing a room, a bathroom, and a kitchen, it does get rough. Everybody was good about switching out everything and sharing, and everybody on the show really was great. And so we were all very understanding.

What was your reaction when you realized that it wasn’t about the outward physical appearance?

I went to the show promising I’d stay true to myself, my beliefs, my convictions, and that I would not do anything that I regretted. I didn’t want to embarrass my family or my friends. If it had been any other reality show, I probably would have been the first one to get kicked off. It was just an honorable moment for me. I can’t even begin to describe the feeling once I found out.

Did you discuss with your parents how you were going to be on the show once you actually got on it?

Of course people warned me about reality TV, the editing, the production, everything. I was cool. I knew that I was not going to do anything or say anything that I normally wouldn’t do or say. Reality TV isn’t bad if you go promising just to be yourself and don’t change and don’t do anything where you’re going to have regrets.

Were you shocked, or did you already have an idea that there was more to this contest?

All of us contestants had no idea that there was more to the contest. Little things would happen that were quite odd and strange. But we thought that it was just the producer trying to get in our heads, trying to produce drama to make good TV. Whenever funny stuff happened, we really had no clue that we were being judged on our inner beauty.

There would be times where I would seriously look around the room for hidden cameras and couldn’t find any. And now when I watch the show, there were actually hidden cameras in there, especially the first episode when we were getting our beauty graded. They left all of the contestants’ medical files right on the seat next to me. I thought, “What’s going on here?” So I looked around and I really could not find any cameras. In that episode there were five cameras zooming in at every direction. Technology is crazy.

It almost seemed like they were trying to trick you into going against your natural impulse. If it was me, I would have been dying to see what the other contestants’ results were.

I wanted to look at the other contestants’ pictures, but I didn’t want to touch the files because I knew that was wrong and basically illegal.

What was the most challenging part of the true beauty competition?

It was really not having any idea what you’re doing. One day they’d say get up, put on some clothes, we’re going to go camping. You just have to be ready for anything. And that gets exhausting, challenge after challenge. You just want some normalcy.

Do you have any fond memories?

All of the people were really great. We really had a lot of fun together. Whether it looked like it or not, we really are all still friends. We all keep in touch, and we really all learned a lot about ourselves because of each other. The most memorable time was when Ray kept running around the house naked. I try to forget that, but I can’t (laughs). Ray was the surfer, long hair. Then Billy and Joel were asleep (they’re the old timers), and Chelsea, Laura, Ray, and I were so bored that we resorted to playing hide and go seek. And then we decided to get our bed sheets, cut holes in them and pretend like we were ghosts and we tried to scare Billy and Joel. We were acting ridiculous, and that didn’t make TV?

Nobody in the house knew how to cook. Ray could cook turkey burgers, Laura could cook spaghetti, and Billy could make protein shakes, and that’s it. I was basically the designated cooker and that’s scary because everybody back home knows that I’m not a cook. I try, I have the best intentions, but we had Mexican fiesta every night because my specialty was chicken fajitas.

As a former beauty pageant winner—Miss Grapevine, right?—how do you think those pageant experiences helped you during the true beauty competition?

During True Beauty everyone kept referring to me as a pageant girl, and that’s simply not correct. I was a girl that did pageants. I did it for the scholarship money. It allowed me to do my community service, have my platform, and it opened a lot of doors. When people ask me if the pageants helped in any way, I say not really. It’s the way I was raised really. You have to be ready for anything or for everything. It’s about your character or how you handle yourself and the way you handle certain situations. Some pageant people are experienced in that, but I think mine’s just from the dedication of dance I’ve gone through my entire life. I would say dance has helped me more than the pageants.

Can you tell me about your dance experience?I started dancing when I was about 2-1/2 years old. I’ve been dancing ever since. It’s my passion. It’s my love. It’s what I do. It’s literally the best therapy. I dance almost every day. I take classes. I dance semi-professionally; however, I’m focusing on other things right now; but really dance is my passion, and that’s what’s gotten me where I am today as far as confidence, time management, discipline, etc.

What kind of dancing do you do and what is your training?

I am a performer for two different entertainment companies. I travel around the country for corporate events. I’m a magician’s assistant, too. I’ve studied ballet, tap, and jazz, and point my entire life. Tap is my specialty. My #1 influence and who I look up to the most is Savion Glover. He’s an amazing tapper.

What are your ultimate career goals?

I want to be a respondent, a host, or a reporter. Get paid to talk. I’d love to have my own talk show and hopefully be an inspiration to other people as well. True Beauty has opened so many doors. Tyra Banks, one of the producers, hired me as a correspondent for her show. She’s helping to make my dreams come true. She’s an amazing person, and I am so grateful for her.

You hear about these reality show people who win the competition and you never hear about them again. How has your life changed since the contest?

Since winning the contest, my life has changed quite drastically because I moved from Texas to LA and am pursuing my dreams. It’s opened so many doors. The prize money gave me the chance and ability to move. As far as everyday life, things are the same. Nothing has changed as far as my personal life, but as far as my career, it has changed overnight. I still spend time with my friends and family. I work. I play with my two doggies at home.

So what was it like to be one of People Magazine‘s 100 Most Beautiful People?

Being in People Magazine‘s 100 Most Beautiful People issue is the best thing that could have ever happened to me. Everybody goes to pick up that magazine. I buy it every year to see who made the list. I like to see who made the cut or not. And I made the cut this year! If you have dreams, pursue them and follow your dreams. If you can dream it, achieve it . . . really! I still get giddy whenever I think about it. I’m so excited. It’s such an honor to be a part of that magazine.

I remember something you said on the show, that you wanted to enter the Miss America Pageant and that you felt perhaps by winning the True Beauty Contest, it would help you get the recognition you need to help you win the pageant.

Not really. When I was Miss Teen Texas in 2002, I received a public intoxication ticket, and I gave up my title. I was depressed for a number of years and down in the dumps. Then I realized one day that you can’t lie around and have all these regrets. You have to really learn from your mistakes and move on. I can go and I can teach other kids not to make the same mistakes I did. I can be a learning tool. And that’s really why I went back to pageants. I won Miss Grapevine. I went to the Miss Texas organization as an outlet for that. But True Beauty was really a better outlet—national TV. It’s okay if you make mistakes—just learn from them. My new saying is “Have no regrets.”

Do you think that there will be another True Beauty contest?

Yes, I think there will be another contest. A lot of people ask how it could happen if everybody already knows the secret. But Ashton Kutcher kept “Punked” going for a long time, and he’s one of the producers.

What is your definition of beauty?

I hate when people ask this question (laughs). Being 100% comfortable in your own skin whether you are short, tall, large, or small doesn’t matter as long as you love who you are and are comfortable with who you are. That’s my definition of true beauty.

Are you a role model?

To have come from almost nothing and come to where I am today shows so many people if you dream it you can achieve it. I think it’s so true. I realized I made mistakes and I’velearned from them. I’m really hoping that other people can see that it’s okay if they make mistakes, too and learn from theirs as well.

What are your own beauty secrets?

Hydrate. I try to go to the gym almost every day or every other day. I use a moisturizer. I’ve learned that less is more. I used to have eyelash extensions and those are long gone. Embrace the natural beauty. And that’s my number one beauty secret.

Lowest Low & Highest High

I was a dancer my entire life and I got into pageants because talent was 40% of the overall score. Then I won Miss Teen Texas. It was a huge dream of mine. Once I started pageants, I realized what you could do. The doors had opened. The people you can touch . . . it was a really huge honor. I messed it up. I did something really bad. I was a hypocrite. I was embarrassed and ashamed. I realized you can’t sit around and have regrets. My highest high was realizing on True Beauty that we were being judged on our inner beauty. I just remember thinking my family was going to be so happy, and that was definitely my highest high.

What advice would you give to someone who wants to be in a reality show?

They’re fun, you learn a lot about yourself. It’s a once in a lifetime opportunity. Don’t do anything you will regret. Think about your friends and family who will be watching—young and old, and stay true to yourself.

Interviewed by Kaylene Peoples